I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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