oh god the rape fog is back!
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize