Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
nothing makes up for a small, perpetually flaccid penis quite like a British accent
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Randomize
