i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Randomize
