He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
