So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
You made out with two different species that night
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
