What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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