Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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