Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
