I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
