wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
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