So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
