Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
