Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
Randomize