idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Foreign objects found in purse this morning include: chocolate covered pretzels, pepper spray, and farm animal shaped key chains (you know the ones you squeeze and fake poop comes out, yea those)
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