yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
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