Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
Randomize
