Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
My mom found a condom in my purse
Correction: my mom found a used condom in my purse.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
