well you can't waste a boner
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
