half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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