We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Pretty good. They took the stitches out but it still hurts like a bitch. The doctor says I should be off crutches by next week.
Well, that's good. Let's hope drunk you doesn't sabotage you.
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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