so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
