Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
The Russian stripper asked if I like foreign girls. I told her I absolutely fucking hate accents. Most awkward 7 minutes ever
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Randomize
