i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
