too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Randomize