i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
farters have to be the big spoon...
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Hey man your outta milk
How the hell do you keep getting in my apartment?!
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
I need a beard to bite.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
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