Where is the hickey?
A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
