normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I woke up and there is a food processor in my purse. Someone else's framed family photo. My front door is wide open and my gerbil is playing in the water bong.
Yeah I'm going to bathe him.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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