brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
I stopped understanding conversations unrelated to vodka two vodkas ago.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
