That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
