my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
