like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
