i think my tv is drunk
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
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