We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
