Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Randomize
