yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
It was kinda hard to explain to his wife why there was chocolate syrup on the ceiling.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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