It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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