What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
Randomize
