We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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