I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
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