turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I was peeing in the bathroom at this house party when a guy just casually stumbles out of the shower
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
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