I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
Randomize
