Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
You made out with two different species that night
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
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