can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
All I know is I woke up with my apartment door wide open, naked, and I poured an entire bottle of Advil on my bed to sleep in.
Randomize