you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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