i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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