I'm really into asian looking animals
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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