haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Randomize
