i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
