We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Randomize
